SO things are starting to come together again finally. My psych put me on a new medication called Buspar. Its another anti-anxiety medication. basically, my body is not producing enough serotonin to interact with the anti-depressant (lexapro). So the Buspar is a serotonin drug that is designed to create more serotonin in my body for the lexapro to react with. Things have been going much better since being placed on this medication except the fact that I am a bit of an insomniac now. So... bring on the sleeping pill. I feel like a walking pharmacy and I hate it. Its against my own moral standards to be taking any kind of drugs like these and now I take a whole collection of pills. I'm so disappointed but I see their purpose and they are working.
I feel like a giant cloud has finally been lifted up from over me and I'm finally getting a chance to view the wreckage in my life. What I have done, what I have been through thus far is not pretty. I'm very disappointed, and now begins the hard work of rebuilding myself and getting back on track. Hard work it is indeed but I am up to the task and ready to take it on. I'm very grateful to have such an amazing support system of friends and family and I thank them all. If not for them, things would be drastically different. I am humbled by and appreciative of you all. Thank you.
Two days left in January 2009 and I have just 13.4 miles to go to make it to the 100 mile mark for the month.. here's hoping I can get there!
I Dare You - Shinedown